Thursday, December 22, 2011

Commitments for 2012


{Courtesy of Google Images}
"Resolutions" has become a dirty word. Every year we make our list, which is usually comprised of things we have no intention of actually doing if we're honest with ourselves. How many times have you sworn to yourself, "This year I'm going to spend less time watching TV" or "I'm going to stop gossiping" or the classic "I'm going to go to the gym FIVE TIMES A WEEK, without fail!"? I know I do, every single year. But these are empty promises that are more based in tradition than any sort of actual commitment.

But this year I have some extra motivation to follow through with my resolutions. And I'd like to start by throwing out that dirty little world. I'm not sure what I want to call my philosophy for the year 2012 or the little promises I'm making myself, but I do know that I want them to stick. I'm tired of doing things half way. Sabotaging myself and my goals. I have a feeling I'm not the only one who knows what I'm talking about.

Take this blog for example. Writing this blog is something I wanted to do for myself. I enjoy writing it and I enjoy hearing my friends and family respond to it. It's a positive thing in my life. But how often do I stick to my resolution, commitment, goal (whatever you want to call it!)? I haven't posted since early November. How did something I wanted to do, dedicated time and energy to, become a chore? How did my thinking go from "what should I write about on my blog today?" to "eh, it's already been two weeks since my last post...maybe I'll just wait until tomorrow". So beginning now and moving forward into 2012 my goal is to tell the voice in my head to shut up when it says you can wait until tomorrow. Because you know what? If I write here today, I'll be happier today.

Exercise is the same way for me. It's become a chore, something that I can always put off until tomorrow. I don't know why. I love the way I feel when I'm active. Particularly when I get the chance to do something fun and active...spin, hiking, jogging outside in the winter, yoga, dancing, or walking through the city. There is no excuse. I can make the time and I should make the time, because just like with blogging, exercising is a positive thing. Just because it's easier to sit on the couch and just because technically I could wait until tomorrow, doesn't mean that I should. So how do I remind myself of this everyday? Maybe it will require reading this entry or calling a friend and making a date to exercise, but I've got to figure it out. "Tomorrows" add up pretty quickly and before you know it days, weeks, months have gone by.

Then there's my biggest, most important, promise to myself. Enjoy 2012. Give it my all, 100%. Jeremy and I are beginning a pretty big journey this year and I don't want to waste it. I haven't figured out exactly what that will require, but I know a huge part of that is savoring every single moment. Even when the pre-wedding stress causes me to have a meltdown I need to appreciate this time. Because these are also the moments Jeremy and I will be building the foundation for our future together on. The choices I make as the wedding approaches all go into forming that foundation. I want to be less selfish and I want to show Jeremy what an incredible life I believe we have in front of us. That's accomplished through each small deed, kind word, and cherished moment.

These are huge commitments. I won't call them resolutions, because resolutions seem to fade by February. But I really think I can do it and the true test will be whether or not Jeremy and I are both still smiling a week before the wedding!

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